My Breastfeeding Badges of Honor

Grateful

9:28:00 PM Edit This 3 Comments »
I had my sprinkle today. It was so much fun. I had an absolute blast just seeing my cousins. As we've all grown up we've each gone our different ways. As we should. But that's definitely made it difficult to hang out etc. I miss them all greatly. And I loved seeing them and catching up with them.

Wonderful company. Good food. What more could a pregnant gal on bed rest ask for?

(I'll post a more detailed update with lots of pictures tomorrow. For now my morning sickness has returnhed and brought a migraine for company. So I'm going to veg and watch "Andromeda strain" with Rob.)

To My Friendly Roto-Rooter Reader

12:12:00 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Hi! Welcome to my blog. :)

I just wanted to take a moment to let you know that I have nothing but respect for you guys. And I would have loved to go with the Roto-Rooter guy who came and gave us an estimate, however, it honestly came down to a matter of money. We need to be able to pay the bills and buy diapers so the difference of $200.00 is a HUGE difference to us. If money were no object, I would have loved to have Roto-Rooter snake the line and "make it like new", as well, as had them replace the entire soil stack and plumbing int the full-bath on the 2nd floor. But that just wasn't feasable.

Thank you for your advice and input. I hope you'll come back and visit us again. I have a feeling that this drama will be on-going for quiet a while. :) lol

Forget you. Forget you. Forget you. You're cool. I'm out.

10:49:00 AM Posted In , , , , , , Edit This 3 Comments »
Seriously. I quit. I'm done. I want out. I want a new life. If anyone knows of any crimes I can witness that will get us into the Witness Protection Program...please let me know. Because right now, that's the only way I see out of this disaster.

So far we have spent $400.00 on trying to fix this disaster that passes for a "house". When last I updated on "The Leak" we were trying to figure out how we were going to afford to replace 2 toilets for an additional $400.00. Apparently, once again, that was the least of our concerns.

After the guy snaked the lines everything was running much better. We breathed a sigh of relief. We dared to think that maybe, just maybe our luck was beginning to turn around. Maybe the rain was going to stop and things were going to get better. *insert insane laughter here* Yeah, right. That might happen if we were talking about someone else's life. But this is MY LIFE. The life where things rarely go as they should. Where the sh*t storms last for weeks and months at a time. This is my life, where "bad" people do bad things and good people get the crap that bad people deserve.

Then we woke up this morning. We used the bathroom because it was fixed, right? WRONG. WRONG. WRONG.

We flushed the toilet twice and everything was working fine. After the third person flushed, everything came back up. When I say everything, I mean everything. The toilet over-flowed so there's stuff on the floor, which happens to be carpeted for reasons beyond my understanding. Stuff flowed back up into the bathtub. And we think, although we aren't sure, that stuff came up/down from somewhere in the 1/2 bath on the first floor. Which means that snaking the line didn't help the issue. Granted, it needed done anyway. However, financially we only can "afford" to what absolutely must be done. And I use the term "afford" very loosely here.

We are, quite literally, drowning in crap at the moment.

*side note* Does anyone know where my slightly altered quote in my title of this blog came from? It's a movie that I haven't watched since my partying days but the quote fits. (It's supposed to be "F*ck you." rather than "Forget you" but I'm trying not to cuss anymore. So "forget you" it is.)

Bed Rest ~ Day 83 Nervous Beakdowns...

9:31:00 AM Posted In , , , Edit This 3 Comments »
No, I did not have a nervous breakdown. Although, truthfully, I prayed for one all day yesterday. I prayed for the chance to breakdown. Shut down. Unplug. I was (and still am to some extent) so incredibly over-whelmed it is absolutely unreal to me.

I spend yesterday with absolutely no appetite and feeling as if I were on the verge of a panic attack (something I haven't had it ages). I kept trying to "let go" just enough so that I could have the panic attack and get it over with. If you've had a panic attack (or many), then you understand what I'm talking about. The build up, the slow decent into the actual panic attack is far worse than the panic attack itself. My whole body feels as if it's electrically charged. My heart feels like it is going to literally beat right out of my chest. It's the whole fight or flight response. Only if I don't have the actual panic attack, I never get the end result, which means I'm stuck in fight or flight. While some people may be adrenaline junks and always chasing that "high", I am not one of those people. I prefer to be calm and laid back. (And yes, I realize that me preferring to be calm and laid back contradicts the fact that I have ADHD and am constantly on the go. But being "driven" by ADHD and being "driven" by adrenaline are two completely different things.) I spent a lot of yesterday crying. Mainly because I didn't know what else to and because of the pain in my back.

Rob, bless his heart, tried so hard to distract me and help me. But there are times when I can't be helped. No one can lead me through the "crap" but me. And I just wasn't in the mood to wade through anymore crap. (Afterall, I have more than enough of that in my walls. ;) lol) He put the window AC in our bedroom window. He went to the store for milk and juice and brought me home a rootbeer and some ice cream. He played "Bio Shock". But I just didn't want anything to do with any of it.

Then to rub some salt in my wounds, my satellite DVR box is fried. Julie and Susan will understand exactly what this means for me. My TV is my main source of sanity at the moment. (And let's face it, sanity is something that seems to be slipping through my fingers at an alarming rate these days.) I have a DVR full of shows that I want to watch. Nothing doing. I can't use any of the DVR features. I have to watch live TV. *shivers at the thought* (lol)

I love my life. I love my life. I love my life....

83 down ~ 52 to go

Ah...true love...

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